One year after: My ‘beautiful husband’,  General Chris Jemitola (retd), lives in my heart

2026-02-15 - 06:10

By Safiya I.M. Jemitola Chris was a beautiful man in every sense. Meeting Chris and being his wife remain a blessing and honour I will never, ever take for granted. It has been a year since the shocking and painful passing of my husband, Chris Jemitola. His death hit me like a thunderbolt, signalling the end of a life of bliss and promises shared by us, especially after our wedding. Coming once again (with some family members, friends and colleagues), a year after, to lay flowers on his resting place at the cemetery, to remember him “and for me to share some thoughts with him, once more”, put an end to the longing that he was going to come back to mother earth, where our journey had started and ought to continue. The life we envisaged was a long one. We were happy to be in each other’s company every day. However, the time God blessed us with was the most intensely engaging time. I won’t trade this appreciation for anything! I have always valued time. However, Chris increased my value for time and valuable things. He never squandered it, and our time together was certainly not squandered, but used for valuable things. When we got married, the ceremony was as we wanted it to be. Very intimate. It was the opening to a beautiful life and valuable future we had talked about; living as one entity. And, Chris was a great unifier and a man who did a lot to bring his family and all together. He was a man who loved family values and gravitated towards those he believed shared those same values. The Jemitola family carries this grief, and we are living each day as best as we can, carrying this deep loss with us. Ososo in Akoko Edo area of Edo State lost a great son. Every single day in our marriage was an exciting challenge to do more. Not just for each other alone, but also for the families, friends, and significant others. Being happy, grateful, and fervent servants of God, humanity was our main focus. The future for us was always a work in progress – it still is, realising that we must honour the time we have. Seeing the urgency with which Chris expressed himself in the last days before his ‘journey’ is a testament to how much one must strive to be in tune with themselves. His presence remains with me as I am now tasked with the responsibility of honouring the future we both planned for, making sure his legacy lives on and his memory honoured. For so many who have had a loved one’s earthly journey cut short, there are always questions and worries, if only ones did their best and if more could have been done. So much intense emotions flow through you as the days go by. Then, one day, you feel a particular emotion. The next day, you’re numb and then angry, and the cycle goes on until a new life and times of normalcy. I feel lost without him by my side, and I sometimes find myself calling out for him to find me. My last moment with him in our home, at breakfast, was truly a gift from God, and I am eternally grateful to God. Chris knew he was loved. I loved him completely, and he was so happy. We were in love and happy. I remember when numerous family members and friends of his confirmed that we were always in sync, ready to serve each other and “Chris found love with me”, which gave me comfort as I knew I was by him, and he on my side. Because of Chris, I experienced and tasted love, and could never ask for less. Now, I wish that type of love for the whole world. A love so pure! Seeing things all around that remind me of him is quite refreshing to my hurtful heart. I always want to share daily updates with him, yet knowing he isn’t by my side is tough! In the past year, some unexpected and shocking challenges have come and passed, and others continue to linger. Each day has unravelled by itself, granting one a first-hand experience of how life could be – especially for widows... I know for certain that, “Nature has made up her mind that what cannot defend itself shall not be defended.” Darkness and light can never be in a fellowship. Because of this belief, I’ve defended and honoured the man Chris was, and I shall do my very best as his dear wife; a shield and a protector. My thoughts are clearer, and one must clear the path to forge ahead with courage. My head is up high, and strong is my entire being, by the Power of Allah. I am thankful for the gift of being Chris’s wife. I feel his presence in my every waking moment and in my sleep. Chris was a mix of many things. Yet, in all, he tilled and built for others. And so, will I continually play active roles in his legacy projects so as to immortalise his good name. “Do not squander time,” Chris would admonish. Chris was a very jovial man. “Ah! Chris, we run am no be small”. I had always exclaimed and added more in Pidgin English; “I dey your back. I dey your front. I dey your side. Anywhere you want make I dey, I dey for you.” And Chris would respond; “Are you sure?”. My response would always be “Always and in all ways. Na me and you go run am”. For Chris, my beautiful husband, my other prayer goes that every good and kind deed by him, be rewarded by God and to grant him eternal life. Chris made me smile; may God make him smile. Chris made me happy; may God make him happy. Chris gave me gifts that gladdened my heart; May God accord him the same and much more. Chris loved me completely so dearly; May God shower love on him. Chris honoured me; and I also pray to God Almighty to lift him up and keep him in His Bosom. Chris was a one-of-a-kind man and husband, as I pray to God to receive my prayers, bless him abundantly, while the Angels lift him high. Amen!